YES, I AM STILL HERE peeking out my window on Main Street, and if you are reading this column today — Wednesday, Oct. 16 — then we are only two weeks and one day away from Halloween and that puts me in mind of a few scary things I have survived in this long life.
I survived seeing the movie “The Thing From Outer Space,” most commonly remembered as the first (of 3) versions of ‘The Thing.’
The original black-and-white one is still the scariest if I do say so myself. The networks often rerun it this time of year.
And it is also the main reason I joined the Navy, not the Air Force when I was 18. More on that in just a bit.
In the movie setting, it’s just after WWII and an Air Force-science expedition to the North Pole discovers a magnetic anomaly. They trace it down to a shadowy circular shape under the ice which they later discover to be a flying saucer (for years the Air Force denied the existence of UFOs just like the Arkansas Game & Fish Commission denied the existence of mountain lions).
They blast their way to the saucer and retrieve the body of a large, large, very big, and huge ‘alien being’ encased in ice.
They haul the block of ice containing this thing back to their science base.
And now the reason I didn’t join the Air Force.
They put the ice block on a table in one of the science rooms and leave one Air Force guy in charge.
He stoopidly puts a blanket over the block of ice and, naturally it begins to melt.
Next thing you know the Thing is loose and is killing sled dogs and Air Force guys all over the science base. The airmen can’t flee to the outside because — well — it’s the Arctic and there are always howling blizzards there.
I’ve never put my faith in Air Force guys since that blanket.
How I saw ‘The Thing’
I had never been to a scary movie and I was probably about 12-13 years old. Some Louisiana cousins were visiting, and the oldest handful of us talked my mom and Aunt Lucille into letting us go to see the movie.
We walked to the old Elberta theatre. I figure it was about six blocks from our old house on College Street.
I was scared before we even got to our seats. I heard one of my younger cousins begin moaning as soon as the lights dimmed and that scary music started.
We were so scared we almost couldn’t breathe and it got worse as all of the Air Force guys and scientists on the big screen began looking for The Thing.
They opened a door and SUDDENLY it was there.
Howling. Or, maybe that was one of the cousins.
Or me.
I dropped to the floor. The brothers and cousins followed suit. We literally crawled up the aisle to the theatre lobby. Screaming. Crying.
We huddled together outside the theatre. Oh, Lordy, we hadn’t counted on it being dark when we got out.
We ran the six blocks home. I’ve often said that the single bravest thing I ever did was to slow down so as not to run off from the younger ones.
We made it home without being attacked by The Thing. We stopped at the ditch at the back of our yard to catch our breath and to give the little ones a chance to stop crying.
We made a pact. We would never tell Mom or Aunt Lucille about how we ran out of the theatre; otherwise they might not ever let us see a scary movie again.
I think one of the cousins later spilled the beans, though.
Another scary thing I survived is seeing The Gurdon Light.
More on that some other time.
And something else I survived are the Haunted Houses and Horror Mazes that otherwise-responsible adults put up at this time of year for no other reason than to scare the pants off kids. And some adults.
Yes, that was me at age 25 screaming in fear deep down one of the dark passages of the Haunted House.
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SIGHTS IN THE HEAVENS. First, last week our area had several nights in which the Northern Lights could be seen.
And now people are saying that they’ve seen the comet with the unpronounceable name in the western sky shortly after sunset.
I wouldn’t know.
Sunset is after my bedtime (this is an exaggeration), and I’ve already seen the Northern Lights and a comet, anyway.
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THINGS I LEARNED from opening e-mail: “For those of you that don’t want Alexa or Siri listening in on your conversation, they’re making a male version … it doesn’t listen to anything.”
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WORD GAMES. The twins: Red Beans and Rice. My Louisiana cousins.
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HE SAID: “I am like the sick sheep that strays from the rest of the flock. Unless the Good Shepherd takes me on His shoulders and carries me back to His fold, my steps will falter, and in the very effort of rising, my feet will give way.” St. Jerome, theologian
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SHE SAID: “If you have enthusiasm you have a very dynamic effective companion to travel with you on the road to somewhere.” Loretta Young, actress
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SWEET DREAMS, Baby
