Pokin’ Fun
by Doc Blakely

This is the time of year
when we should all be reflecting
on love, peace and
the greatest story ever told.
It’s Christmas so I thought
a change of pace would be
in order. I’d be at least half
serious. But I’ve often said
that beneath every wave
of laughter there is an underlying
ripple of truth, not
to mention soggy socks.
Here are some inspirational
thoughts as my gift to you,
plus comments that may
reinforce the thought. It’s
sort of like saying a word
and blurting out the first
thing that comes to mind.
Like men (rough), women
(soft), Tarzan (Jane), you
get the idea:
A friend’s secret is a sacred
gift: it must be kept forever
(Can you believe that
terrible rumor about Sheila?
I certainly can, what is it?)
Look back to where you
have been for a clue to
where you will be going
(I’m sorry officer. That car
was driving too close in front
of me.)
Marry someone whose
soul you love (And her seafood
gumbo ain’t bad either).
In an argument a cool
head will soothe a raging
heart (Lay your head on
my chest, my pacemaker is
acting up).
Cut your losses if you
make a mistake. Just say,
“I am human” and move on
(Find another poker game).
True friendship is a fabric
that nothing can unravel
(False friendships are like
that little string you pull on
a feed sack).
Holidays are the dessert
in the meal of life, enjoy
them to the last calorie
(I’ll go on a diet tomorrow,
starve ‘til I waste away, I’ll
go on a diet tomorrow, but
I gotta eat today).
Melt the icy fingers of
fear with the sunshine of
hope (Wait ‘til the sun shines
The lonely heart finds
love in unlikely places
(Around nuclear waste
dumps companions are
easier to find in the dark).
Pure joy is as rare and
as fleeting as a wisp of fog
(But if you get a whole lot of
wisps together your chances
go way up).
Home is that place where
you feel most safe (Too bad
that lesson was wasted on
the New York Mets).
If life gives you lemons,
make lemonade (But if life
gives you lemonade to start
with, ask if life can spare a
little salt and tequila).
Marriage is a contract
written in the ink of passion,
respect and compromise
(I know a guy who learned
that the hard way when
he was stabbed with a ball
point pen).
Hope is as essential to the
soul as oxygen is to the body
(Or conversely, me without
you is like a fish without a
Gossip is like a river: it
can always be traced back
to its source (Or may the
sewers of Rangoon backup
in your sister’s corset).
Find something you truly
believe in and everything
else will have meaning as
well (So…I believe I’ll go
take a nap now). www.
Humorist Doc Blakely
is a professional speaker/
from Wharton, Texas. He
has been Pokin’ Fun at himself
and life for 40 years.