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Pokin’ Fun By Doc Blakely

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Interesting Facts About Dreams
The Everly Brothers had
a hit recording many years
ago entitled Dream, Dream,
Dream. It sounded like a
song written for triplets
and was a bit redundant
but nobody seemed to care
because it became a smash
hit. The first line indicated
that this lovesick boy was
smitten with this girl and
she didn’t give a fig about
him, but all he had to do
when he wanted her near
him was to dream, dream,
dream. Now, this presents
a problem to the practical
part of my mind, which is
admittedly on the narrow
side to start with. Does he
take a sleeping pill, listen to
the political debates, read
the new health care bill, get
hypnotized, or talk back to
his mother-in-law to get the
dreams started?
Here are some facts
about dreams to help you
to deal with your interpretations
of them…or not:
We all dream, even those
of us who claim not to, say
scientists. In other words
don’t try to deny it, you
cannot possibly win an
argument when the cards
are stacked against you in
this manner. It’s like asking,
“Answer yes or no, have
you stopped cheating at
dominoes?”
During a typical lifetime
people spend an average of
4 years dreaming. Personally
I think it may be longer
than that if they are slick
enough to get reelected.
According to estimates
by dream researcher J. Allen
Hobson you forget 95%
or your dreams shortly
after waking. First of all,
how does a guy get a job as
a dream researcher in the
first place and what are the
qualifications? I’ve never
seen an ad in the paper like,
“Dream researcher wanted,
must have photographic
memory, quiet bed side
manner, be a self-starter,
and salvage at least 5 %
of research data. Previous
experience at related industries
such as Discount
Mattress, Massage Therapy
and Pajama World a plus.
MBA or Ph.D. from accredited
Universities preferred
as long as you have a commercial
drivers license,
can count sheep and are
familiar with advanced
dipping vats.” Oh, and I
think it would be good to
mention the ability to type
on a Smith-Corolla portable
typewriter, use white-out,
operate a copy machine
and collate stuff.
While 80 percent of
dreams are in color there
are some people who insist
on dreaming only in
black and white. In studies
where dreams were in
color the dreamers have
been awakened and asked
what colors they saw. The
majority of them chose soft
pastel colors. The black
and white dreamers chose
charcoal and milk. Most
of them were raised on a
dairy farm.
Do animals dream? Yes,
say researchers. Dogs run
and chase squirrels in
their sleep they say. Cats
dream of catching rats and
sharpening their claws on
a bench grinder. At one
point a gorilla was taught
sign language and when he
woke up he signed “sleep
pictures” which thrilled the
scientists. I think he was lying
because he later signed
for bananas on a Mastercard.
www.docblakely.com
Humorist Doc Blakely
is a professional speaker/
writer/musician/rancher
from Wharton, Texas. He
has been Pokin’ Fun at
himself and life for 40 years.

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