YES, I AM STILL HERE peeking out my window on Main Street, and I almost can’t tell you how frustrated I am about our rainfall — not only because we’ve just had a mere light dusting of moisture in October and November, and our lawns and landscape plants and hay pastures, creekbeds, etc., are all dying, dead or dry as a bone.
NO! The real reason I’m frustrated is because Saturday’s rain DID NOT hang around long enough to discourage Trick-or-Treaters.
There were in my neighborhood — I do not exaggerate — 70 or 100 cars, and maybe several hundred costumed youngsters dashing across streets in front of those cars.
They were gone before midnight this year.
When it comes to Halloween I am a “Bah Humbug” kind of guy. Back decades ago when I observed Halloween, my wife and I spent far, far too much money on treats for the streams of Little Darlings that would ring our doorbell.
I even saved “It’s Boy/ It’s a Girl” cigars from proud pappas during the year. I would sneak those a cigar into a trick-or-treat bag along with a Tootsie Roll Pop or two.
That lasted until my wife found out and shamed me into ceasing.
Lots of my neighbors really get into the spirit of Halloween. One brought me a cigar.
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THANK GOODNESS. Last week’s celebration of Johnny Wilson’s century of Scrapper Pressbox volunteerism reminds me of how glad I am that he doesn’t announce every Scrapper First Down with ”It’s another Nashville Scrapper First Down!”
It’s just one of those things that makes our town classier.
It happens everywhere in OTHER stadiums. Even when some weak team is behind by 50 points and a penalty nets them a First Down. The pressbox announcer enthusiastically cranks up the tired old phrase.
Up in Fayetteville when the Hogs were getting their usual thumping by Missouri, the announcer joyfully shouted that First Down message both times our lousy team accomplished that 10-yard milestone in the second half.
The Arkansas Athletic Director, football coaches and players are vastly overpaid in my opinion., and should be tarred and feathered and run out of town.
Let the practice squad suit up.
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GONE BUT NOT forgotten.
A sharp-eyed citizen has informed me that the “No J-Turns” signs in our town’s Central Business District have been taken down.
Fearlessly, I asked our mayor about it.
Yes, he answered fearlessly, adding “But they’re going back up.”
The signs were removed, His Honor explained, because the city had received some complaints that placement of the signs blocked the view of oncoming traffic thereby creating a traffic hazard.
His Honor told me that as soon as someone figgered out a better place for the signs they’d be put up again.
Same for the “No Speeding Bicycles on Sidewalks” sign.
I admitted that I was extremely lucky — in my hellion days of youth — never to have run over an unfortunate senior citizen emerging from a store laden with packages.
Me, too, His Honor admitted after I promised him that the Statute of Limitations had expired for most bicycle offenses.
In the meantime — until the signs are restored — the Unofficial Downtown J-Turn Enforcement Officer should feel free to shoot at J-Turn offenders and bicyclists on the Main Street sidewalks.
My words, not his.
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CAME ACROSS an article recently about Bullies and Bullying.
The article in “LifeScience” said that about half of sixth graders say they have been bullied at school.
The science site had some suggestions for parents: Turn off the TV and the cell phone. Put away video games. Read to young children; let the older ones read aloud to you; take outings together; eat meals together seated around the table.
One of the problems is that Joe and Judy SchoolPatron are reluctant to believe their own precious child might be the bully.
Our schools take steps to stop bullying, and I congratulate them for it.
I have one other suggestion: Do not let your child forget what the inside of a church looks like.
That suggestion is ironic because most of my playground fights were because I was a different religious denomination than most kids.
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THINGS I LEARNED from opening email: Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don’t have film.
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HE SAID: “A fanatic is one who can’t change his mind and won’t change the subject.” Sir Winston Churchill, a witty UK statesman and WWII hero.
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SHE SAID: “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it’s the only thing that ever has.” Margaret Mead, anthropologist and author.
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SWEET DREAMS, Baby
