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Mine Creek Revelations: Trump on Trial

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YES, I AM STILL HERE peeking out my window on Main Street and I am despondent that the former President of the United States is having to face a jury in a criminal case.

I am sorry about that, but I do not believe any President is above the law.

Americans are also witnessing something else new, at least as far as I know.

Officers of the court — and their families — are being threatened by some violent folks who are hiding in the shadows just because of the identity of the defendant.

Potential jurors know they may be singled out for intimidation or be unable to reach a just verdict because of that fear.

They have to know that their lives will never be the same no matter whether Trump is found guilty or not guilty.

This thing will drag out for 10 more years and nothing will happen.

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IS WINTER OVER? I am sorry to have mentioned this because I am one of those people who worry about peaches. Knock on wood.

So, I guess the winter of 2024 is over without a snowfall.

Lots of cold temps, though.

In January there were 14 days with temps under freezing.

In February there were seven.

In March there were two

None in April. So far. I do not want to jinx the peach crop.

Pretty close to normal in rainfall through the first three and one-half months of the year.

January had the lowest temperatures. Overnight low temperatures got as low as 4 degrees on two nights.

January also had 10 days when temps slid below freezing overnight.

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THE ECLIPSE. I’ve heard from many, many citizens who noticed that the swarm of eclipse visitors took little notice of the traffic signs in Nashville’s Central Business District. Let me just say that the event underscored the need for a designated Downtown J-Turn Enforcement Officer.

But what about the hospital’s Senior Citizens Nose and Ear Hair Clinic? The clinic was already covered up with potential clients because of the recent full moon which sent wild hairs into fast growth mode.

So, the powers that be here in Nashville and in Howard County need to get off the fence and find some deserving senior citizen willing to take on the responsibilities of either and/or both of these two important positions. I have someone in mind.

And as free advice I would like to refine the qualifications for the Nose and Ear Hair Clinic position just a mite — this person need not be armed, although it is most important that any J-Turn Officer be armed. Either official should be splendidly in uniform.

Although he or she won’t be armed, the chief of the Senior Citizens Nose and Ear Hair Clinic should be issued a standard BIC butane cigarette lighter to be used for torching those nettlesome silver hairs that sprout uncontrollably out of the nostrils and ears of certain senior citizens. Some people have warts which feature a single long hair.

I am sorry to report that the Hospital Auxiliary has declined to raise funds for the clinic which is a shame because some of them might qualify for the clinic’s services.

Is the Senior Citizens Nose and Ear Hair Clinic REALLY that important?

Let me just answer with a short, true story.

The new hospital at De Queen is in financial trouble.

The new hospital at De Queen does NOT have a Senior Citizens Nose and Ear Hair Clinic.

That should tell you.

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THE LONG WAIT is over. The audit report for the governor’s swell new podium has finally been released and Her Excellency will not like it.

The report notes that neither her office, nor the Washington, D.C., buddy from whom the swell podium was un-economically purchased has cooperated with the auditors.

The audit report doesn’t make the governor look good.

The report is reportedly turned over to law enforcement, but the state’s Attorney General has given a clean bill to the governor ahead of time.

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WORD GAMES. The Test Tube brothers: Research and Development.

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HE SAID: “If the pressure is getting to you, whistle. In a barely audible way. It’s the best way I know of to let go of tension. Music gets your mind off the situation, and the act of whistling melts the tension out of your body.” Fuzzy Zoeller, professional golfer

Before I became a reformed golfer I went to the St. Jude tournament in Memphis. I briefly walked along with Fuzzy and I can attest that he does whistle quietly. It wasn’t ‘Arkansas Fight.’

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SHE SAID: “The country is making a big mistake not teaching kids to cook and raise a garden and build fires.” Loretta Lynn, C&W songstress

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SWEET DREAMS, Baby

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