YES, I AM still here looking out this window on Main Street, and I cannot believe I actually see the sun and blue skies.
Here’s a verse from a lively gospel piece sung by Mahalia Jackson:
Didn’t it rain, Children
It rained forty days, forty nights without stopping.
Noah was glad when the rain stopped dropping.
Knock at the window, a knock at the door,
Crying, “brother Noah, can’t you take on more?”
Noah cried, “no, you’re full of sin
God got the key and you can’t get in.”
In the four months of 2020 it has rained 66 of the first 121 days. That’s more than half. Each of the four months have been substantially above normal in rainfall, especially April.
Normal rainfall for the first four months is 17.46 inches. Here in Nashville we’ve officially had 28.85 inches. That’s 11.59 inches above normal. Almost a foot above, in fact.
In January it rained 23 of the 31 days.
In February it rained 14 of the 29 days.
In March it rained 16 of the 31 days.
In April it rained 13 of the 30 days.
Didn’t it rain, children? Yes, brother Noah, and there’s a knock at the door.
In August I’ll be whining about how dry it is.
=—-= — =
SOME BIG NEWS that isn’t connected to the coronavirus.
I should be taken out and shot. Sometimes the devil takes control and my computer puts out some really tacky stuff like this.
The National Aeronautics and Space Administration conducted a contest among grades K-12 across the nation. Students were invited to suggest a name for NASA’s solar-powered helicopter which will ride a rocket into space this summer; land and explore the surface of Mars.
The contest was cleverly called “Name the Rover,” and almost 30,000 names were suggested.
Of course, NASA spokespersons gushed mucho mucho praise for the clever names suggested by Little Darlings from all over the United States. After all, this was a publicity stunt, right?
Last week NASA announced the winning name and the winning student.
She’s a junior class member at a high school in Alabama.
Yes, wink wink, I am also surprised that the winner is from NASA’s home state. More winking.
Since she’s a typical Alabama high school junior class member, she’s also 22 years old and is rumored to have a weekend job at a gentlemen’s club. And it ain’t auditing the books.
She can hardly wait until she loses a few more teeth so she can fit in better with the club clientele, many of whom are her relatives. They always come on the weekend after welfare checks arrive.
The name she suggested?
XXX XXX. (JR won’t let me print her real suggestion)
“One of my mom’s ex-boyfriends come up with the name,” the proud winner bragged to an interviewer from a lying newspaper.
Now NASA has to find a college grad from Los Angeles to spraypaint the name onto the aircraft. Needs a tutor to correctly spell XXX XXX.
Don’t mean to get things stirred up ahead of the Alabama-USC football game this fall (if we have college football).
Maybe XXX XXX can do a pre-game fly-over of the LA Coliseum.
=—-= — =
WALL OF PRESIDENTS. On a wall in the back room of the chamber of commerce office here are the pictures of the men and women who have served as president of the chamber board.
Well, almost all of them. From the early days we are missing Cecil Callaham, 1942, and Lester Stueart, 1962.
Mr. Callaham operated the movie theatres here and was also elected mayor. Mr. Steuart founded and operated two large grocery stores. Both were progressive gents who helped form our little community, and the chamber of commerce was one way they served us all.
There are nore blank picture frames from more recent years.
They include: Bruce Anthony, 1973; Roger Cox, 1998; Charlie Peek, 2008; John Gray, 2009; Mary Woodruff, 2014; Ouida Terrell, 2015; Will Martin, 2017; Bill Craig, 2018; Tammy Gibson, 2019.
Problemo. Even if Bill Craig gave the chamber his picture today there isn’t space on the wall to hang it. Someone will think of something.
=—-= — =
SUNDAY WORSHIP during the quarantine. Once again lots of local people posted Facebook pics or videos of their own religious services. Once again lots of people listened to church services on the radio.
The obligation of Catholics to participate in the Mass was still suspended, but like their Christian brethren many found a way to be a part of live services.
Sunday morning I ‘attended’ Mass at the Chapel at the Diocese Roseau Pastoral Centre in the Dominican Republic.
The Mass was in English. The priest spoke with that charming Caribbean accent derived from African, French, Spanish and the Queen’s English.
The altarboy had dreadlocks.
If you read this column you know that in previous quarantine Sundays I’ve been at Mass at Little Rock, New York City, Boston, and Hong Kong.
Next, I’ll try Capetown, Casablanca or Halifax.
=—-= — =
WORD GAMES. Another set of twins: Bits and Pieces. Just a little step at a time. Be patient.
=—-= — =
SWEET DREAMS, Baby